Blankets to Remember

Br. Kevin Kriso, ofm, tells the story of how the Christmas blankets laid at the final resting places of fellow Franciscan friars came to be.

When I was in seventh grade, my father passed away from cancer. It was a very difficult time to say the least, but there was also a gift that came from this time. His death forced me at a very young age to ask some of the “ultimate” questions such as, “Who is God?” “Where is my dad’s soul right now?” “What is heaven like?” Pondering these questions put me on a trajectory of wanting to be closer to God and ultimately becoming a Franciscan friar.

My mother was good about helping my three siblings and I face the reality of death and the afterlife. She brought us to visit our father’s grave at least twice a year – around Father’s Day and Christmas. Each Christmas we went to the Garden Center and purchased a “grave blanket.” A grave blanket is a flat, rectangular wreath-like arrangement of evergreen branches that might have a Christmas bow, pine cones and artificial Christmas flowers wired to it. To me they seemed like something only a trained craftsperson could produce. Years later I came to realize two things:

1)    They are not that hard to make
2)    Outside of the New York City area where I grew up, few people knew of them

Fast forward to a few years ago when we were decorating the Mountain’s chapel for Christmas. Looking at a pile of evergreens at my feet I realized, it would not be too hard to make a grave blanket from these. Fr. Dan Hurley, ofm, had died the winter before and it seemed good to make one for his grave. The next year Fr. Harry Monaco, ofm, a dear friend of the Mountain, died so I ended up making two grave blankets that year. Then Fr. Bob Struzynski, ofm, died and the following year I made three.

Last year, Fr. Dan Riley, ofm, and I brought the three grave blankets to the cemetery and he took a photograph of the three gravesites with the three blankets. As they say, the photo “went viral.” I cannot tell you how many positive responses came back to me. It was a bit overwhelming.

So it all goes back to my mother taking us kids to our father’s grave at Christmas 40 years ago. Maybe this year you will want to get a special vigil candle to burn this Christmas in honor of deceased loved ones. Maybe you can wire a bunch of evergreens together and bring them to the cemetery. Maybe you can buy a little figurine of a little lamb or some other creature to put in your nativity set in memory of someone.

Honoring deceased loved ones, feeling their closeness, knowing they rest in God and knowing that we ourselves will be welcomed into that heavenly home someday are all wonderful Christmas experiences.  Through the experience we come to know that Jesus is Emmanuel, God is with us.